Previously, on WLPH…

WLPH forms on Nathrezim during Burning Crusade, giving trade chat a guild name it will never forget.

Shinji gets a precautionary soulstone on Void Reaver, dies before 90%, and releases himself straight out of the instance.

Abec’s Twins countdown ends at “3… oh shit, go” when he jumps off the ledge and pulls the boss early.

Abec calls getting stuck behind Sunwell’s bushes “skateboarding” and needs an Intervene or a summon to get out.

Grady plays Pinkberry to focus the raid before WLPH’s server-first M’uru kill.

WLPH takes Nathrezim’s server-first Kil’jaeden kill and finishes Sunwell.

WLPH briefly raids as MORGAN FREEMAN, then rebuilds under its original name.

The PUG loot system counts every mistake and every item against you, with off-spec loot mercifully costing half a tally.

WLPH moves to Scilla, and the entire announcement is one word: “transfer!”

The first Scilla review is “SUP WINTERGRASP IS PLAYABLE.”

WLPH reclaims its guild name on Scilla the day after the transfer announcement.

Mimiron PTR attendance becomes a bargaining chip for how much DKP survives Ulduar.

Abec starts collecting raid quotes for the homepage, ensuring every embarrassing callout gets a second life.

Abec announces he is done with raiding and WoW, then immediately reveals the April Fools joke.

Peggle faces competition when someone proposes Pictionary during raids.

The video-game music quiz promises 500 gold to first place and 250 gold plus a personal /spit to second.

WLPH starts recruiting a DOTA tournament team because one game apparently is not enough.

Abec’s text-message spam makes a guildmate laugh mid-sale and somehow helps sell a few add-ons.

The guild’s new music player has exactly one genre: Mega Man.

Hitshade plans a three-minute guild tribute and threatens to gkick anyone who cannot follow filming directions.

Someone finally asks why the guild ranks look like “:)” and “^--_^” instead of ranks.

A no-show without warning now costs whatever DKP the raid earns, because five seconds of notice beats twenty minutes of hunting you down.

Mini and Cahn chip in to expand Vent to 80 slots for the growing PUG and main runs.

Abec promises an “Abecnormous” DKP night and free loot, with a gkick for anyone who misses it.

A $22.95 monthly Vent bill inspires a 5,000-gold bounty for a cheaper voice server.

Someone complains the forums have become a “can’t make raid” noticeboard, then uses that very post to say he cannot make raid.

Abec declares screenshot week: every boss gets a picture because he has “plenty of funnies.”

Crucible opens the G-Bank General Store and turns guildmates into suppliers for cauldrons and feasts.

Mumble gets installed on Abec’s orders, and the setup guide ends with “don’t complain.”

Mininolan takes movie requests for his late-night streams with Kipp, Cahn, Crazyd, Tay, and Ghost.

The realm-transfer proposal asks everyone to debate calmly, which is itself a bold WLPH strategy.

Abec offers no-questions-asked transfer help so everyone who wants to come to Sargeras can come.

The Sargeras transfer is confirmed with “Get your asses to Sargeras.”

Abec declares he is not the guild parent after Mini’s Mumble shenanigans.

Squirrel’s arena team celebrates eight seconds of fame in a PvP video.

The running joke about Mini’s yard being full of playground slides becomes confusing enough to require its own explanation thread.

Guildmates remember Cahn, and the tributes reach old friends from Nathrezim and Scilla.

The resurrection sign-up starts with three tanks and one healer, which feels very WLPH.

The comeback immediately produces the important question: “WHERE ARE MY GUILD REPAIRS.”

WLPH reports 39th on Sargeras with an average item level of 525 and keeps catching up.

A favorite-moments thread remembers sweaty Hard Mode Mimiron attempts and hauling a PC to a friend’s house to get hyped together.

A last-minute WLPH BlizzCon shirt project runs up a $97 bill.

Hellfire Citadel tempts another comeback, starting with “me and a couple others.”

Discord wins Crazyd over because GIFs make it “10 times better than Mumble.”

During the Discord voice test, Ghost discovers that Czd's voice is playing through his television.

Randy discovers his inactive WoW guild has passed to level-40 Punken, along with the bank, and opens a ticket.

One week after praising Discord, Abec tells everyone to go back to Mumble.

Abec estimates his Lost TV collection at two terabytes, corrects it to 237 gigabytes, and gives Czd an opening to call it abemath.

Czd tells the guild he played six hours of Grim Dawn and lost all his progress.

Tifa spends five minutes fighting YouTube's volume before discovering the computer's master volume is muted.

Ghost finds Brotherman Bill karaoke and announces that he can finally play it at every party.

Czd tips fifty hat coins to a player who picks Lycan by mistake after playing a Naruto custom game.

While everyone reviews footage of Mini dead during the fight, Mini declares himself raid Jesus and says he died for their sins.

Ghost remembers crafting Drew's Hydross resistance gear, only for Drew to sell the account afterward.

Kipp reports that Mini mocks Spektra for playing Slark, then picks Slark himself and feeds.

Czd relays Abec's plan to reroll on Nathrezim for Legion, and Ghost says he would rather stay on Sargeras.

Randy makes his first soda flat, then explains that carbonating it after adding syrup would spray the mixture everywhere.

Kipp accuses Mini of farming MEE6 experience, Mini says he is discussing work, and Czd investigates whether the bot is broken.

Snipe spends three minutes getting nowhere on Mercy, switches to Bastion, wins a minute later, and gets called a bad support.

Randy lists the guild's favorite exaggerations, then includes his own habit of claiming to be good at games he sucks at.

A poll to ban Jahn gets only three votes, so Jahn stays and Randy leaves instead.

The new Mumble gives everyone admin powers, with mutually assured destruction offered as the solution to the old admin wars.

Czd goes four weeks without Dota, plays League at a LAN, and calls it the sacrifice required to fit in with computer-science people.

Fordelf answers “lol yes” when asked about WLPH, and the next line is “You have been removed from group.”

Ghost unbans Randy and takes away the other admin's powers, ending this round of Discord moderation with a reversal.

Even on Discord, someone still asks whether this is the “new old new Mumble.”

Czd proposes a book club, Abec asks about Street Fighter books, and Parfait starts calling for the BOOKCLUBBOYZ.

Czd blames Myndor for stopping his Game of Thrones reading, then asks whether any books were published after A Dance with Dragons.

Czd advises Abec to switch his new SSD from relational databases to GAMING, inventing the setting the hardware apparently needs.

Abec pitches a thirty-acre WLPH guildhouse after finding a property listing and asks everyone for their thoughts.

Czd remembers ruining Nathrezim's world-dragon fights while Myndor remembers staying home to wait for the spawns.

Czd denies putting himself on Nathrezim's wiki, tells everyone to check the history, then admits he edited it once.

Abec tells DreamHack entrants they can list WLPH as their sponsor, while Parfait complains that Czd still has not mailed the stickers.

Abec delivers his Mercy tank-kill brag, gets no response, and realizes he has been muted the entire time.

Abec proposes a reading race with a three-week head start for himself and a ten-page daily limit for Czd, who still expects to win.

Randy cancels the proposed Street Fighter bet because even beating Abec would make Abec happy.

Czd joins an outside book club and says everyone's enthusiastic introductions make it feel like a cult.

During The Dark Knight, Abec says there are twenty-three minutes left, and Myndor calculates that there are actually sixty-two.

Mini and Kipp improvise Birth of a Cam around a Russian boat in a winter storm, while Abec tries naming it Crooked Hillary.

Mini remembers Cahn giving him a Battlefield strategy guide for Christmas and calls it a great joke.

Abec spends eighty dollars on Randy's joke gifts, and everyone debates the delivery order of the trampoline, Street Fighter guide, and Mountain Dew.

Toadily announces he got banned, Czd corrects him to kicked, and Toadily responds by declaring it BANNED again.

Tammy returns after three years, gets treated like a possible impostor, and watches Abec try a ban command before requesting a movie called Tammy.

Abec's movie bot starts announcing imports, Czd threatens to ban it, and Parfait asks for even more completion notifications.

After a one-percent G'huun wipe and the eventual kill, Abec calls the mistake-reporting site tattletell.io.

Tam asks how Czd's logging bot handles edits and deletions, and later Czd reminds everyone that he can see deleted messages.

Abec gets kicked from a G'huun pug after assuming it uses WLPH's strategy and missing two Blood Feasts.

Czd reaches chapter three of Xenoblade Chronicles 2, accidentally deletes the save, and finds himself back in chapter two.

Tay hits Best Buy's display television while trying to catch a Pokémon, puts down the controller, and walks out very fast.

Czd accidentally updates ElvUI and discovers that the raid-frame problem he had been fighting is finally fixed.

Abec proposes a WLPH guildhouse with mandatory skits, calorie limits, and workouts.

“WLPH movie night” returns to chat years after Mininolan’s original forum request thread.

Czd takes Tamdaman to Two Strike Policy after the earlier recruiter never contacts him, then calls the move a taystab.

Lawler and Abec remember Meeks complaining about two-in-the-morning Hyjal while someone sings Eye of the Tiger.

Czd's Freehold group investigates why the run is so strange and discovers Granus left the dungeon set to Normal after transmog farming.

During UFC stream trouble, Lawler proposes a guild telecommunications company as the successor to the guildhouse.

Toadily gets a two-day XP-potion ban, says he barely reached ninety-eight, and blames another hour on the Legion opening scenario.

Czd tries inviting Duvail to the Classic reunion, discovers he is already banned, and gets a returning Duvail in chat anyway.

Abec finishes getting every Tetris SS rank, and Jackie asks whether anybody actually said he could not do it.

Czd spends five hundred million ISK on his first EVE battleship and names it Tamdaman.

Randy gets his Vertagear chair refund despite forgetting to send the armrests back with it.

Abec makes WLPH-style Arduino gauges and plans an ED-209 warning for anyone who gets too close.

Abec keeps shaving milliseconds off a Mario Maker run while Kipp insists he thinks the route can still be faster.

After disliking a Mario Maker level, Abec says he retaliated by taking all of that maker's world records.

Lawler misreads his ban expiration as two in the afternoon and discovers it had already ended while everyone was doing Scholomance.

Ghost appends get ganked by GRIZZLY and wallow in sorrow to the guild's two-and-a-half-hour world-buff schedule.

Mini gets kicked from Fruit Vendor's Discord before he can do any trolling, and the conversation reveals others were removed too.

Tay corrects Garr trash to Garr adds, then Toadily reports that Mini's Geddon bomb almost wiped the raid.

Ghost and Czd kill a hunter in a Winterspring cave, and Ghost reports thirty Alliance arriving afterward.

Abec finds coworkers who play Street Fighter and Tetris and announces that he has replaced the guild with real gamers.

Abec describes catching up on chat as watching “season 15 WLPH.”

Randy keeps killing Red Dead Redemption 2 legendary animals in water and discovers he cannot skin them there.

Randy criticizes Mini's karaoke performance, and Mini explains that the singing was supposed to be bad.

Czd records the raid from the wrong client, while Livy asks why there are no logs.

After the Core Hound wipe argument, footage shows Ghost standing AFK, and Abec apologizes for calling him out from confusing logs.

After the rowing bet, Kipp proposes making Randy use Thedreadlord240 so the number stays attached to his name.

Byron digs up an old paladin theorycraft article quoting him, and Lawler checks whether reactivity is actually a word.

Livy reports that the June 20 crash erased his editing ramdisk and all the work on it.

A month after asking what the socialist guild bank means, Faty says he is still waiting for his benefits.

Parfait tries seeing how long he can talk to himself about Malazan before Toadily interrupts and Czd joins in.

Czd rushes to sixty for the guild gold prize, regrets skipping the story, and says the prize has not been paid yet.

Mini arranges for Concept's remaining raiders to join Arcana Imperii with equal DKP, then posts his own announcement before someone else links it.

After losing three hours of Palace of the Dead runs, Czd measures the wasted time as eight Torghasts.

Turdles scores ninety-three on Fashion Report and discovers he forgot the earrings needed for the full setup.

WLPH is pronounced dead again, immediately followed by news that some old guildmates are playing TBC Classic on Benediction.

Toadily ends his turn after defeating Slay the Spire's Awakened One, having forgotten that the boss has another phase.

Czd gets his Classic refunds, then clarifies that the drunken rant went in the cancellation survey rather than the GM ticket.

Randy believes the story about Mini punching a wall over Vashj until Kipp and Ghost explain that it was a joke.

Mallone posts a Christmas message rejecting shallow copypastas, and Czd, Toadily, and Tay immediately copy it back.

Czd recommends Malazan because the series is finished, and Parfait immediately asks where the third Kharkanas book is.

Livy accidentally deletes Mini's SWG stuff while Czd considers hiding the farms Mini put in his name.

Kipp proposes faking proof that Lawler won big in crypto so everyone can pretend they missed out.

Ghost remembers Randy asking whether he should be able to see the moon in daylight, and Parfait brings the question back the next day.

Abec pitches WLPH:SMP and nominates Crazyd to build the Minecraft server.

Turdles spends an hour trying to get a spear from a camp in Elden Ring before finally doing the tutorial.

Kipp proposes an Elden Ring deadline bet involving Lawler, then corrects invite Lawler to unmute Lawler.

Ghost helps Abec get Elden Ring ultrawide working by pointing out the executable rename he missed.

Abec keeps fighting respawning summons until he discovers the invisible snail he was supposed to kill.

Abec makes homemade Sprite with a gallon of water and a pound of sugar, then starts questioning the recipe.

Abec takes two backstabs from an invisible assassin before learning there is a torch that reveals it.

Abec deletes the Plex request bot and tells everyone to use the request website for their movies instead.

Tay discovers the D-pad arts controls twenty-five hours into Xenoblade Chronicles 3, and Ghost admits he missed them too.

Ghost says his eighty-hour Xenoblade Chronicles 3 clear skipped too much and decides he needs level seventy before finishing chapter three.

Ghost gets kicked from six Battlefield games by anti-cheat before a repair finally lets him play.

Lawler says God of War's puzzle hints ruin the controller-passing routine because they solve the puzzle before his turn.

Czd cannot find his Final Fantasy XIV expansion purchase, buys it again, and learns too late that Turdles has a spare key.

Czd explains that the new logger's special role exists because it relays the main channel, and Abec gives it an unusually straightforward compliment.

Abec gives four passengers a launch in his 300, shreds the belt and idler pulley, and barely makes it home.

Abec reports 142 movie and television requests from Tay at 1:20 in the morning and makes sure everyone knows he is not joking.

Chat gets an AI songwriter and immediately commissions songs about guildmates.

Czd asks Clyde to persuade Princess Leia to abandon a Rust reset and save Earth, and Clyde defends her attachment to Rust.

Lawler asks Devastator for code, gets chatbot use cases instead, and watches Abec disable it before sending everyone to another channel.

Devastator declares eleven the highest known prime, and Czd tells Abec the bot is broken.

Czd says Lawler bullied him into eating ice cream from a bowl, and Lawler praises mixing in Hershey's syrup.

Livy proposes a ban bet involving lobster, filet, and throwing out the second plate, while Lawler keeps arguing over the terms.

Lawler's question sends Devastator through three reasoning passes, and Abec reports that it exhausted GPU memory.

Lawler asks whether Abec won by hiding in bushes, and Abec says the bush camper was the last opponent he nearly lost to.

Abec answers Fortnite's difficulty survey after finishing second, then blames his harder lobbies on saying the difficulty was perfect.

Lawler asks for 39 instances of Devastator, because apparently one is not enough.

Abec accidentally hits a Fortnite NPC, watches it fall to its death, and gets no mythic loot for the trouble.

Tay beats Prometheus with a level-fifteen Zeus-Hera build and gives Czd the breakdown of his lightning damage.

Ghost remembers borrowing Thunderking's axe to try it on, logging out with it, and then quitting Priston Tale.

Ghost beats Solidus five times in Metal Gear Solid 2 and keeps getting stopped by the post-boss freeze.

Lawler asks Devastator for a picture of Meowscles wearing bell-bottoms.

Bill announces that he has just started Diablo IV, then immediately declares it time to request a refund.

Respecto asks whether Tay quit the galaxy idle game, and Tay explains that he keeps forgetting to turn his computer back on.

Lawler's oil change takes an hour as the jack refuses to lift, his glasses break, and twenty minutes go to complaining.

Respecto posts Parog remembering Czd as a Nathrezim rogue, and Czd corrects the memory to an orc shaman.

Snipe spends three hours investigating a droning water pipe before discovering his mother left the hose running.

Bill buys a used PC and finds himself cleaning out cat hair instead of enjoying the upgrade.

After reporting a million views, Abec revives the guildhouse promise and says it will just take longer.

The guild name becomes a Discord identity: “I am WLPH (literally now).”

Abec plays Roblox's last-letter game and reports getting stuck with fd as the next required opening.

Abec returns to WoW, hearths into Shadowlands, gets lost, and announces he is not logging back in.

Livy asks whether Gorillas in a Coupe means a Cadillac and reports getting kicked from the group.

Abec min-maxes an eight-hundred-dollar router to fight rubberbanding, and Livy brings the discussion back to his frame-generation latency.

Lawler posts his maximum-token central-bank prompt twice, and Devastator points out that he pasted its own prompt back.

Lawler remembers renting Resident Evil from Blockbuster and using his only typewriter save after he had already run out of ammunition.

Tay abandons Mina's daggers for a hammer, and Respecto admits he upgraded the chain before making the same switch.

Abec collects four months of posts from four Fortnite developers and builds an analysis to challenge their claims that they are listening.

Livy builds a SWG item-link relay with Grok, and Lawler mocks automating trade chat into clickable Discord links.

Ghost replaces his mother's terrible GPU with a 1080 Ti, and Lawler predicts her eventual Devastator-and-FarmVille setup.

Ghost kills a level-seventy rogue who tries to gank him, then gets followed and camped by the same rogue.

BlizzCon nostalgia immediately turns into a joke about needing a DirecTV ticket.

Tay wipes on VanCleef, hears the warlock offer a soulstone after everyone is dead, and leaves with Smite's hammer instead.

Lawler asks Grok to correct Abec politely, then asks it to edit away the insulting instructions before Abec sees them.